by Andrea Schuver
reprinted from News & Views; newsletter of Florida Network
on Adolescent Pregnancy, Parenting & Prevention; Winter 1999
Andrea Schuver is Executive Director of Prepare Tomorrow's Parents.

Don't you agree it is tragic that the toughest, most complicated job in the world comes with no training?

We all recognize our schools' importance in providing teen mothers with knowledge and skills for good parenting. But far more can be accomplished toward more nurturing, safe and mentally healthy families and communities by offering parenting education for ALL students.

Following recommendations of Starting Points, Zero to Three and many diverse experts, The Parenting Project, a Florida-based national non-profit network, promotes the integration of parenting and relationship skills education into all K-12 curricula and youth programs when primary prevention is most effective -- while attitudes, beliefs and life expectations are in formation.

Teen Pregnancy
Through parenting education, girls and boys comprehend that bearing and caring for a child are among life's most critical and challenging responsibilities, benefiting from emotional maturity, stable relationships and financial security. By teaching the rigors of good parenting, and by building critical thinking and problem-solving skills, parenting education enables young people to make informed life decisions, including postponing childbearing until they are ready to put their learning into practice. Those who do become teen parents have vital information and skills to apply immediately, such as: avoiding prenatal alcohol; sensitive newborn care; "shaken baby" syndrome; and the importance of fathering.

Cycles of Violence
Insufficient knowledge of child development, health and positive discipline lead to unrealistic expectations clearly linked to abuse and neglect. Harsh childhood treatment and lack of nurturing and stability are great predictors for violence, including abuse and neglect of one's own children. Intervention and education after problems are detected come far too late for maximum benefit and may be unable to reverse harm already done. Parenting education for young people, regardless of their personal upbringing, can develop empathy, non-violent communication and relationship skills, and knowledge of positive parenting techniques to interrupt these intergenerational cycles.

Early and Consistent Sensitive Care
We are now well aware of the brain's extraordinary malleability and need for optimal cognitive and physical stimulation during the earliest years. Less understood is the importance of consistent, responsive parenting in that critical period, to establish enduring emotional capacity for the empathy, self-esteem and motivation, persistence, positive relationships and resiliency that greatly determine success in later life. Early abuse and neglect can permanently damage neurological development, impairing cognition, impulse control, and learning from the consequences of one's own behaviors. Less obvious poor parenting is implicated in depression, addictions, teen pregnancy and delinquency. Our schools must participate in making this vital information part of everyone's knowledge.

With opponents complaining of "crowded curricula" and the need for going "back to the basics," it's important to note that K-12 parenting education yields benefits long before parenthood. New skills are used immediately with classmates, latchkey siblings, parents, etc. Through modeling and instruction, teachers develop more caring, cooperative learning environments that reduce discipline problems and foster social and emotional health critical to student success.

Parenting education need not require much time or funding. A variety of flexible, teacher-friendly, inexpensive programs are available. Their high-interest, motivating activities may be integrated into math, literature, science, social studies, etc., capitalizing on students' universal attraction to babies and "real-life" learning. Some center on monthly visits from a baby and parent. Older students may care for an infant simulator 24 hours a day. Key topics may be already included in or added to courses that may be coordinated thematically. A new Florida law mandates marriage and relationship skills instruction in the 9th -10th grade lifeskills class.

Schools and youth programs routinely provide career planning. Why not also prepare young people for the vital job nearly all of them will eventually have -- parenting?

For more comprehensive information, including programs and learning materials, visit www.preparetomorrowsparents.org, email info@parentingproject.org or 561-620-0256.

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