David Dooley
ddooley@bak.rr.com
David Dooley teaches sixth grade math and science at Sequoia Middle School in Bakersfield City School District in California. Teaching is his second career. He is a long-time proponent of parenting education for young people as primary prevention, and a long-time supporter of Prepare Tomorrow's Parents.

I had a wonderful dream last night. I dreamt of a world much nicer than our own. The inhabitants seemed kinder. Few people had crippling personal problems. Newspaper headlines didn’t scream crime and mayhem. In this world, I didn't hear much about drug abuse, family violence, child abuse and neglect. Most people seemed to be leading successful, constructive, fulfilling lives. I was intrigued. I wanted to live there. I wanted my family to live there. I asked a lady standing nearby what it was that made her world so different from mine.

She replied, "Our world used to be like yours, but we came to realize that if all children were raised by caring, competent, responsible parents with good parenting skills much that was wrong with our world could be eliminated and much that was right could be enhanced. We began teaching good parenting skills to children so that when it’s time for them to begin families they are prepared from a skills standpoint and aware of the enormous responsibility and sacrifices they must make."

I looked at her in awe mixed with disbelief. Could such a simple strategy truly have this effect? She could see I was skeptical.

"Think about people you know." she said. "Responsible, caring, competent parents with good parenting skills usually raise responsible, caring, competent children. Irresponsible, uncaring, incompetent parents with poor parenting skills tend to raise emotionally crippled children who behave irresponsibly and/or criminally."

"Hmmm. That's true." I remarked. "I can think of several examples from my own experience. So why are children taught parenting skills? Why don't you just teach parenting to parents?"

She replied, "In our world parents are free, and in fact, encouraged to take parenting classes, but as you're probably aware it's very hard to change the behavior of an adult, especially if that adult was raised in an abusive home where poor parenting skills were used. We reasoned that we would be most successful preparing children for their future role."

"I see your point. When do you begin?"

"We start when they're nine or ten and they get parenting instruction every year all the way through high school age."

"That seems a bit much. Do you really think eight years of parenting instruction is necessary?"

"Well, what value do you place on the future? How children are raised will directly affect the quality of your life and your children's lives."

I couldn't disagree with her. I thanked her and strolled away. "Improve the civility of our society and quality of our culture through the teaching of parenting skills to children," I thought to myself. It sounded like a crackpot's notion, but if there was ever a dream I'd have come true this would be the one.

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